Treat Your Children Well

I find my situation slightly ironic that I am surrounded by children almost every day of my life and yet I am not a father. I am not saddened by the fact that I have no children of my own. It was a choice I made in life and besides, I have two nephews and two nieces.

What with my nephews and nieces and students in the classroom, I can still dish out advice and worldly wisdom. I just have to remind myself to be careful; they are not officially my kids.

So what would I advise parents if they came seeking help about their children’s issues (See my last blog)?

Loving one’s child seems so easy and so obvious but it often becomes distorted and misinterpreted. Disciplining one’s child, as long as it’s handled sensitively, does not mean a parent does not love his child.

So how should one deliver love?

Listen to the child and understand his/her needs and interests. So when that mood change happens, it may not simply be initiated by puberty. Perhaps, there is a larger issue here. Bullying perhaps. Loss of self-esteem. The list is endless.

So know your child well and know when to give him/her space but also to make yourself available when problems arise. Show a genuine interest in your child’s abilities and talents. Genuine is the key word here. You know when you’re faking emotion. Hey, so does your child.

But most of all, sit with him/her through the bad times. You brought this child into the world so you had better take responsibility for ensuring he/she becomes a healthy, happy person.


About randycoates

Randy Coates graduated from the University of Waterloo with a bachelor of arts degree and went on to acquire his teacher’s certificate at the University of Western Ontario. He is currently an elementary teacher in the Toronto District Board of Education.
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4 Responses to Treat Your Children Well

  1. Renee C. says:

    I think teachers play such a critical role in a child’s life. A great teacher who is kind and compassionate can change a child’s life. I’ve also seen the flipside where a teacher destroyed a child’s (my cousin) self-esteem. The shaming and negative feedback that my super-brilliant cousin received in Grade 6 changed the course of her life, but that’s a long story. What I remind myself as a parent is to treat my child with the same respect and dignity I would treat my best friend with. I don’t yell at or berate or shame my friends. I treat them with dignity, respect, and kindness. I also often tell my kids that part of my job is to be their teacher, it’s just that parents sometimes teach different lessons than teachers!

    • randycoates says:

      Exact;ly. Even good teachers can make the mistake of not using the best approach with a child. However, they acknowledge their mistake, learn by it, and apologize if an apology is necessary. The “scariest” teachers are those who do not acknowledge their mistake or, even worse, do not even realize they made a mistake at all.

  2. Love the picture. Good reminder. I think it is important for adults to show children love and compassion to help the children in their lives to feel secure.

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